Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Things that eat at me...

Trying not to be bothered - BUT - a good friend, a best friend, who said she wouldn't miss my birthday party for the world - bailed on my birthday party this past weekend. Her son had a baseball game at 3:30 (party was 4pm until ??? and food wasn't served until 6:30) and she had a hectic week so after they were just going to lay low. Well rain ensured the game was canceled so I guess they just laid low all night? Her son was also invited to the party so it wasn't about spending time with him.

The reason I'm kinda bothered is that her birthday was in April and she also threw herself a party, and I worked a double shift that day - 11:30 am until 10:30 pm and then I rushed to her party and stayed out until 2am partying with her because no matter how hectic I wouldn't miss her party.

I guess I'm finding out who loves more in this one. :( She often tells me how hectic it is being a single mom and I get it, really I do BUT I wish that I thought she understood that being married to a disabled man is no picnic and while her dependent is growing more and more independent by the day the opposite is happening to mine.

I had a great day, a great party, and I have great friends. Just found out that one I had ranked up there in the top 5 of friends maybe doesn't see me quite the same way. :( But I will get over it and forgive and hope to be a higher priority next time but won't hold my breath.


K13 said...

I'm sorry to hear of your disappointment, but I totally understand. I've learned over the past year or so, who some of my true friends are (and aren't).

verybadcat said...

it sucks that she didn't seem to understand (or care about?) your expectations- that you wanted to share the day with the people who matter.

rach is just like this- you had better be at her events, you better be in the front row cheering her on, but if she doesn't *feel* like showing up for you, boo to the hoo.

i've learned that it is way more about her being self-centered and selfish than it is a reflection of her affection for me.

still hurts, though.


Layne said...

Have you talked to her about where she was, etc.? That really was insensitive of her.

I hate those friendships where I'm the one that puts forth more effort. At this point in my life I have decided that if the other person doesn't reciprocate at least almost as much as I do, I don't have time for them. That's no friendship in my book if I'm the one going to see them all the time, making all the phone calls, making all the plans. I have too much going on in my life to waste time on someone that doesn't make time for me.

But, either way, it just plain sucks to realize that someone we think highly of doesn't seem to think as highly of us.